Senior Year

So let's see.

Last time I left you I had just finished my junior year and was going into the summer, that sounds about right. 

Well senior year of college was a whirl wind, a beautiful hot mess of a whirl wind. I started the year off in an amazing apartment downtown Holland behind my favorite breakfast food place so right away I was #winning. I also got to live with the most amazing and strong four girls I have ever met.

Z, E, and O were amazing roommates and it breaks my heart that I didn't get to live with these girls longer. Z was my sorority big and my best friend along with E. You know when you get that feeling that you have met the people who will be in your life until you die? Yea these girls are it. O was quiet and not around much, hard working engineering student, but she was such a gem and I could not have asked for a better fourth roommate.

First semester senior year went smoothly. I finished out all of my last remaining credits so technically I could have graduated in the winter but I had absolutely nothing set up so I stuck around for the whole year. Plus I wanted to walk with my friends and give my dad that moment to be proud and brag about his little princess.

Second semester was crazy. Since I had finished all of my required credits I took the least amount of classes I could and made them all fluff classes. I had a cushy schedule with classes on Tuesday and Thursday that included ballet, pointe, art, and a feminism class. This lead for ample time to plan out Greek Orientation (Z and I were the pledge masters/hell captains/Greek orientation leaders) and drink...a lot.

I loved every moment of Greek Orientation and fell in love with every one of our new members. I took on a second sorority baby and she is such a ball of sunshine. I got to know so many more people in the Greek system at Hope and it filled my heart with joy. 

From there Z, E, and I's days left for a lot of room to create chaos. We partied and drank like crazy most every night. Looking back at that last semester I can't believe my liver never gave out. Thank you body for still functioning and loving me despite the abuse I put you through.

I had fun, let go, and started to realize some of the things in my life that were happening I did not want. I realized I didn't know who I was and got scared. I needed to change that and figure life out because at that point I had no fucking clue. From here I broke up with R just before celebrating 6 years together, great timing on my part I know. From there I realized how wonderful it feels to be single, I had not experienced that in 6 years!! It was very uplifting and life changing. After that I hit the ground running. I went out with boy after boy and learned that I have a weird talent for attracting boys, a lot good and a few not so great but we have to learn from our mistakes before we know what path is the correct one to choose, right?

After a crazy senior year and not knowing where time went I graduated. I left Hope for good. I left my friends. My squad was not in one apartment any more.

I was okay but also not. I didn't realize but at that time in my life I was not okay at all. That's when things started to go down hill slowly.

After a month of freedom at home I packed up and went to camp for the summer.

This is where I'll leave you. We will delve more into summer camp in the next post. What a crazy few months there let me tell you.

Until next time darlings

XOXO

ZMH

Z, O, E, and I at Fall Crawl

Roommate bonding while drinking all day, quality stuff

Z and I in our Hell Captain uniforms

M, myself, and EC (my new sorority little)

Z, E, and I at our sorority formal

R and I at graduation

The squad after we walked across the stage. Don't let those smiles fool you, we were all a hot mess that day. To say there wasn't a decent amount of sad drinking I would be lying.

Oh Hey, I Didn't See You There

My goodness has it been a long time. Sorry about just dropping off the face of the earth but that seems to be the theme with this blog. I try really hard for a short time to post regularly and then something comes up and everything stops. 

I've never aspired to be a super successful blogger but I have always found writing and publishing very therapeutic. Through my writings I try to be as transparent as possible and hope that maybe my posts help someone through something they are going through.

Geeze I don't even know where to begin from the last time I left off. A lot has happened in my life and a lot has changed. So let's see, I went to camp again and it was one of my favorite summers back. I had such a wonderful staff in my unit and my co-unit directors slayed this summer. 

I left camp with a boyfriend (GASP! What wait what happened to R? I'll get to that). Camp boyfriend was a long time friend that we decided to date, long story short not my smartest move but we are still friends because we were that close. Anyway we moved together down to Chicago to start adult-ing and it went well for a while and then things went down hill quickly. 

I had a big girl job but was starting to feel lonely, stressed, and get sick. I was not healthy physically or mentally so I made the hard decision to move back to Michigan with my dad. I'm back in the mitten state for a few months while I collect myself and get a better game plan to move down to Chicago. 

Dear lord, a lot has happened. The next couple posts I'll delve more into what happened, how I'm doing, and what my plans are. For now this blog will be a way for me to sort through my feelings and thoughts. It may not be very exciting but maybe this will help someone out there? Really this is more for me and if people want to read and support along the way that would make me so happy. There will be photos when I have them and maybe some other goodies.

So this post has a lot of loose ends hanging and I apologize but you will just have to wait for more posts to come to get the blanks filled in on how my life has progressed. 

Until next time darlings

XOXO

ZMH

Sunday Service & Speke Estate (Liverpool Day 4)

 After a long day of watching futball and traveling on the bus Sunday was a pretty laid back day with church and touring a local estate. 

My self and a couple other of the students went to All Saint's Church in Childwall for the family service in the late morning. It was a pretty short and fun service because all of the kids were there. It was noisy and entertaining to watch the kids run around and answer questions about the bible that were asked.

After the service the whole group met up and took the bus out to see Speke Estate. This estate had been around for 400 years. This estate is a traditional Tudor style estate meaning that it is low to the ground and wide as well as painted on the outside the tradition black and white.

Way in the back you can see the estate, we had a little bit of a walk up to the estate but we enjoyed the pretty fields and forests surrounding the area.

Above is door to the carriage house. This was used to house all of the families horses as well as guests horses. Below was the servants house but was turned into a tea parlour for the tourists.

The front of the estate was currently under restoration so we were not able to see it in all of its glory but you can imagine how beautiful it is! Below shows the Adam and Eve trees that stand in the courtyard of the estate. These trees are about 1,000 years old but it is unsure exactly how old they are because to be able to do that they would have to cut them down. For now the trees stand there and look pretty!

I loved in the first room that this beautiful organ hid a fireplace. The story was that the room was originally two rooms and the family decided they wanted it to be bigger so they knocked down the wall.

This statue above is of a Tudor family member. It is unsure who this statue is but they must have been very important to be able to have such a big and magnificent statue made of them. Below is a portrait of one of the families most important body guards who was later a wrestler. This man was so famous because he was unusually tall for the time, it is estimated that he was about six and half feet tall.

The family was privileged enough to have a separate room for their bathroom which at the time was very unusual. Of course servants still had to heat up water down stairs and run it upstairs for baths but that wasn't problem.

The servants bells in the servants courters. Each bell was made a little differently so that if a servant could not see the bell ring they could hear it and know what room they needed to report to. Below are the remnants of the family's pigeon and dove home. This housed a couple hundred birds that they kept as pets, food, and messenger birds.

Part of the houses back gardens and below is a lovely view of the back of the estate.

After a long day of touring Speke Estate and soaking in all of the information it was time to get some energy from Abbey Friar. I feel in love with this place! It was so delicious, always fresh, and right down the street from campus (also it was super cheap). By the end of my stay the workers knew who I was and what I wanted (no shame).

I found that their litter bins were so pretty! Below is a photo of the little street of shops we all frequented just around the corner from campus. This street held Abbey Friar, the convenience store, Bargain Booze, and the pharmacy.

Overall this was a great low key day and pretty great first weekend in Liverpool. Looking back at these photos I really miss this place, it stole a piece of my heart. I also am really missing the fish and chips, nothing in America compares to Abbey Friar.

XOXO

ZMH 

Your Song

I'm going to take a quick break from my Liverpool posts to share with you what has been going on since I got back.

This year I had the opportunity to be a ballet teacher to 7-9 year old girls and it was a dream come true! I was able to teach at my old dance studio and it was blast. At times it was a little difficult but these girls changed my life and made me smile. 

Last weekend was the studio's end of the year recital. The recital theme this year was L.O.V.E. meaning that all the songs were about love, about places we love, or just songs us teachers loved! My girls danced to Your Song by Elton John and they made me cry. These girls are at the tipping point of choosing to take ballet very seriously or take it something fun to do and so I wanted to give them music and a piece that was a little more challenging.

These girls blew me away and I could not be more proud of them. I hope to return as a teacher this coming year and hopefully continue teaching these girls at a high level.

 My girls in their ending pose back stage

My friend Molly and I, we went from freshmen college roommates to dance teachers at the same studio. I could not have asked for anyone else to go through my first recital as a teacher with.

XOXO

ZMH 

Everton Football Game (England Day 3)

Our first weekend here in England we had the privilege of going to a home football (soccer) game for Everton. Sadly we couldn't see Liverpool because they were out of town that weekend. I am a big soccer nut and that's rare in the USA so I was excited to be in a place where everyone else loved the sport as much as I do. I normally root for Manchester or one of the bigger teams but being able to go to a game for a team that has such a rich history was just as exciting. I had to turn in my reds and pull out my blues.

It was a packed house since it was the third to last game of the season. The teams were playing really hard because they better their season looks they then will move up in football leagues.

The security was watching to make sure no crowds tried to stampede the field during half time or after the game.

The stadium cleared out really quickly after the game which was nice. Everton sadly lost to Sunderland (0-2) but it was still great to hear some of the chanting and the spirit in real life rather then through a television.

After the cold day at the field it was nice to be back on campus and cuddle up in bed with some Abbey Friar.

I have to say that leaving on Wednesday is going to be hard. I have totally fallen in love with everything about England and so wish I could stay. Although I do really miss home and can't wait to see my dad, cats, boyfriend, and everyone else.

XOXO

ZMH 

Slavery Museum, Albert Dock, and Laughterhouse (England day 2)

After the first day of trudging through everything and trying to adjust to the time change as quickly as possible day two was much better. Granted a lot of us were still very very tired but this day was a little more bearable. We still did some stuff as a group but our professors gave us a little more free reign and we were able to do some exploring.

Together we all went to the International Slavery Museum at the Maritime Museum in Liverpool on Albert Dock. Way back when Liverpool played a key role in the slave trade since it was a port city and a good place to stop between Africa and America. Although it was a small exhibit it did hit home and made me think about how much of the world's history is not very pleasant. 

Never in my wildest thoughts did I think I would be standing in front of a real KKK robe. It was really terrifying to stand in front of this display and think that someone used to wear it.

These amazing celebration clothes from Africa were so intricate and bright. They were a little bit of sunshine in the exhibit and showed how despite the turmoil celebration still happened for Africans and they tried the best they could to always enjoy themselves.

After going through the Slavery Museum a bunch of us took the afternoon to wander Albert Dock and pop into the funky little stores that were there. This day was a typical rainy England day but it just made the city look even prettier in my opinion. After looking through stores and getting a little wet we decided to spend the rest of our afternoon bar hoping.

Only in Liverpool will you see a display of The Beatles made out of 15,000 Jellybellies

Later in the day after dinner we were set to go to the Laughterhouse for comedy night but while walking there we ran into Drury Lane and had to ask the question, "Do you know the muffin man?"

Laughterhouse was a great experience. It is a tiny basement comedy club in The Slaughter House and it was packed. There were three comedians and they introduced us to our first live experience of British wit and humor. The first act was great, the second would have been good if I knew about the locals and other towns more, and the third guy had clearly been drinking or smoking to much before he got on. Overall my favorite part of the night was the MC who killed it and kept the whole show from completely flopping.

While at the comedy club we got to sit behind a hen party which is what the Brits call a bachelorette party. There was a mix of older and younger women together out celebrating two different women's last nights a single girls. They were all a hoot sporting as much pink as possible and maybe getting a little too tipsy.

It's sad to think I'm in the last week of my stay here in Liverpool but I love doing these posts because they remind me of how much fun I have had and how much I have learned. I cannot wait to continue sharing all of my adventures and stories with you, let me know what you think or if you have seen any of these things from today's post.

XOXO

ZMH